Tin Women's Vengeance

There's something to be said for vengeance, especially when born, nurtured and then carried out with infinite patience by two very sinister women.

A quick backstory: a coworker, let's call him Dude, is on vacation this week. Prior to leaving, however, Dude decided to play around with myself and another girl from work (who we'll call Badass Wench) and then, true to his cocky and swaggering demeanor, was stupid enough to copy us both on his belittling emails (which detailed his taunting, almighty belief that he is MAN and he can ROAR...in short, he goaded us). I'm sure in his mind, he wondered what her or I could possibly come up with that might disrupt his pretty organized life in any way. Did I mention that Dude might be obsessive-compulsive? Organization, perfectionism and possible obsessive-compulsive disorder are key elements here.

I suppose he never dreamed that Badass Wench and I would join forces. Probably a good thought, seeing where her and I have only really passed greetings in the halls....but his mistake was copying us both on his smug emails, thus uniting us to a greater cause. This is a delightful match made in Hell.

Let's recap and then fast forward: Dude starts small duel with girls individually. Girls retaliate on their own, launching singular and disbanded attacks on Dude. Girls realize that Dude has inexplicably copied them both on emails, outlining his omnipotent status as ultimate and unbeatable male. Girls contact each other separately and join forces, becoming a conduit for rogue sinister thoughts and actions. Girls plot vengeance. Dude leaves on week-long vacation. Girls begin to unravel their ultimate plan. Girls put the grand scheme into motion. Dude is still on vacation, happily whistling to himself around Europe without a care in the world.

Now seriously, tell me that you wouldn't want to do this in your office:
















Oh yes, we're talking pens, rulers, phone, keyboard....FILES....individual papers....even the pushpins that were holding those individual papers....chair....computer....his grandpa's photos.

Go ahead. Imagine the look on Dude's face once he realizes that he cannot do ANYTHING without having to unwrap its foil casing first.