Happy Christmas, Kiddies!

Hey Everyone,

Wishing y'all a happy Christmas. We hope that Santa was good to everyone (and if not, that should teach you to be a better person throughout the year, shouldn't it?). Christmas this year was fairly quiet considering that next year will be a little different. We decided to go green this year, so I bought a little tree in a pot to plant in the yard after the holidays. It was a little lopsided so I had to buy it. I named her Clarissa. She's got character.

We're looking forward to 2009 and hopefully all the good things it will bring. There are three babies on the way in the family: myself, Julie, and Ellen (my sister-in-law who is due in May with her first baby boy). Although it is entirely possible that Julie goes early and has her boy in before 2008 is over.

Winter has officially gripped San Diego and it has been coooooooold out here. Now I know that our version of cold and your version of cold are two separate things but the way I look at it is that ANY version of cold is not good. I say this with a hot water bottle snuggled in my lap.

We've all been good over here although the sleeping issues have finally seemed to have caught up to me. I'm still taking the Unisom but I think my body is adjusting to it because it's taking me forever to get to sleep. This has caused some exhaustion during the day, but I'm glad I've managed to stave off the lack-of-sleep thing for so long. I don't know if I can take a higher dosage of Unisom, so I'll have to ask my doctor on my next visit. Other than that, things have been going fairly well over here. In fact, it's been a little boring but that's most likely due to my high laziness levels. The sofa is still my best friend.

Oddly enough, you would think that my ever-loving sweets diet mingled with my lack of movement would have me weighing ten million pounds but most of the weight has gone directly to the belly. Here's some pics of me looking tired, but nonetheless pregnant. As you can see from the front view, this baby is all sideways for which I'm eternally grateful.

High Fives and Banana Bread

Yesterday, I decided to actually peel myself off of the sofa (after reading a fantastic book entitled Paper Towns) and bake some banana bread. I find it odd that I loved to cook prior to the pregnancy and now, I'm good with some mac n cheese or a microwaveable meal. Thank you, Lean Cuisine, for making life so easy.

The laziness that accompanies pregnancy is slightly off-putting. I really can't find the incentive to get up for anything except peeing nowadays. This, of course, really stinks seeing where there's currently NOTHING on TV and I'll need to do some present-wrapping over the next couple of days. I am hoping that my love of cooking and writing and doing things OTHER than reenacting the daily activities of a sloth will return once I pop this little hobbit out. I also hope that my love of fruits and veggies returns. The kid only wants apples and chocolate. Everything else need not apply.

So today, I brought in some banana nut bread to work. It was a pretty good batch. Very yummy indeed.

Anyway, now onto the fun and exciting things that happened this weekend. On Saturday night, as I was scrolling through the guide to find something on television that didn't have the words "Charlie Brown", "Christmas" or "Grinch" in them, I was rubbing my rounded abdomen absent-mindedly when a hand or foot literally ran the entire length of my belly. Again, I know this is probably boring to you seasoned mommy vets but I've been waiting anxiously for this to happen....there's nothing like a body part protruding from your stomach to simultaneously awe you and creep you out. I can't wait until you can actually make it out so I can chase poor unsuspecting folk around work screaming "It's an alien!"

After some consideration, I decided that it must've been Hobbit's hand and that the kid was trying to high-five me. Either that or it was trying to bitchslap me because fetuses can be cheeky like that, but I'll just chalk it up to a high-five.

For those inquiring minds that want to know: I ended up watching Law and Order Criminal Intent reruns.

Hobbit

I want to know how many of you can figure these out....lol.....have fun!

Trippy Moment for the Day

While we are waiting for the other Hobbit photos, I figured I'd send you an update on my trippy moment for the day. Of course, this pregnancy is completely new to me so every little thing that happens seems astronomical and weird and insane and trippy and fun and NEW. I know for you seasoned veteran mommies out there, my trippy moments will probably cause a yawn but try to bear with me.

This morning, I awoke to some discomfort so I went to move my growing belly out of the way (because it gets itself into interesting positions during the night) and there was a hand or a foot (not sure which yet) protruding from my abdomen. So freaking weird! So of course, I had to try to tickle it....

HOBBIT Makes Its Debut

I have no idea why this pic keeps downloading sideways but here is a pic of Hobbit. I'll post the others once I have them photoshopped at work but this one should quench your thirst.

We have no photos of the nether-regions of the baby because our tech was very cool and did not print off any pics where we could try to guess. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Anyway, all looks well and healthy. Hobbit is a good size and weight, all the organs appear to be intact and where they should be. Heartbeat is strong, vertebrae is looking good....and the baby likes to use its tongue. A lot. It was pretty funny to see.

More to come!

Delay

Sorry everyone, you'll have to wait a little longer for Hobbit's close-up. They had to reschedule us for late tomorrow afternoon...hang in there, kiddies. Coming soon to a blog near you: Hobbit up close and personal.

Hobbit Update

Excuse how ragged I look in this photo....we just got back from a trip to the desert for Scott's Man Club Christmas Party. Needless to say, I ate too much. Not to mention I was tired and hadn't showered. I was too zapped to actually beautify myself for a belly photo. But what's an update without a belly photo?

OK, so I'm a day shy of 23 weeks. Hobbit is active as hell and spent most of the day kicking and pushing and nudging all areas of my uterus. It finally settled down about an hour ago.....yowza.

Inquiring minds wanted to know all sorts of things so here are the answers to all of the questions that have been asked over the past two weeks: I went to the doctor on Thursday afternoon. All seems well, uterus is growing appropriately (and I have the hardened, ever-growing tummy to prove it) and the heart rate is now at 156. Yes, I'm sure that will help all of you try to figure out the gender, lol. But before you get carried away with translating the heart rate/gender theory, I asked my doctor about it and she ensured me that it was absolute "buckus". I think that might be her way of saying "bullshit". To each their own, I guess.

Anyway, you might also want to wait on your predictions because we go in for our ultrasound this Thursday afternoon. Of course, I'll post the photo of Hobbit for everyone, which means that you can all ardently search for penises or vaginas. Oh, stop laughing, you know that's what you were waiting for anyway.

Sadly enough, the weight keeps upping. Before pregnancy, I was 128. Now...I'll try not to cry while typing this....I'm at a buxom 142. I don't think I've ever been over 140. Anyway, my goal is to not top 155 so I'm going to be reestablishing my eating habits. No more copious amounts of chocolate.

I've definitely entered an awkward stage. Nothing is really comfortable and the inability to lift my legs past a certain point is bothersome, but everything else is fine. I slept peacefully in a sea of pillows last night and I'm going to look into buying one of those giant pregnancy pillows that fit in between your legs. Kinky.

I'm off to go watch Harry Potter for the zillionth time. Stay tuned for future updates.

The Name Game

I thought it might be fun to include everyone in this fun baby-expecting process and have us all play the name game. Now, seeing where Scott has the rights if it's a boy, this only pertains to the possibility of the little bun in my proverbial oven being a girl.

Send me a comment with your ideas concerning girl names....but there's a CATCH! All names must have a Q, X, Y or Z in it (it doesn't need to start with the letter but has to have it in the name). So any FEMALE name suggestions will be processed and either 1.) recorded as a possible name for the little tyke or 2.) rudely discarded as tart or tacky by future mom-to-be. That being said, do your best!

And Zinnia's already on the list, so don't even try to go there :)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Turkey Day, everyone!

This year, I am thankful for a loving (if not incredibly patient) husband, my incredible (but sadly distant) family, my amazing friends, my cuddly dog and muse JD, my job (because in this economy I could easily not have one), and of coure, Hobbit.

On that note, I am NOT thankful that I'm gaining weight but I understand that it kind of goes with the territory. Here's a pic of the belly that Scott took the other day:


















I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Damn Friends Making Me Feel Guilty

This past weekend, Scott and I went to a get-together at Jen and Seth's. Toward the end of the evening, Seth asked me if I'd been documenting my pregnancy on my blog...and I suppose I have a little bit....but not too much. Anyway, I ended up feeling guilty that I haven't been sharing the experience that much. I sometimes forget that I'm so far away from everyone and I don't talk to family that often, so whatever I'm experiencing, especially this being my first child, has been internalized for the most part. I do attempt to include Scott in what I'm feeling but it's so hard sometimes. Anyway, long story short, after the accusation-that-wasn't-an-accusation-but-more-of-a-suggestion from Seth, I felt kind of guilty that I haven't been putting some of what I'm feeling up for you all to see. Although it was suggested that I post daily occurrences, I think that might get kind of boring, so I'll just post things on a weekly basis or something.

That being said, before anyone else asks, my next doctor's appt is next week and I have no idea when they're planning on doing, or if they're planning on doing, another sonogram. I've had three so far but I know that one is usually done around 20 weeks. That would imply that another is coming up soon but I don't have a clue as to when. I'll let you know what the doctor says.

I've had a fairly easy pregnancy as far as health goes...in the first trimester, I did have a little nausea but that was more from scents than anything. I wasn't overwhelmingly sick - in fact, I only vomited twice - but I didn't want to do much and that includes moving from the sofa. I did a whole ton of lazing around and reading and watching TV.

The second trimester has been much, much better. I haven't really been too active but I have more energy. I suppose having to pee all the time does that to a girl. I started feeling the baby move around the 17 week mark (I'm now at 21 weeks) and it has been very, very active. It moves and stretches and kicks quite a few times per day. The feeling itself was very alien for me when it first happened, and I find myself at a loss for words....I guess I always thought of a pregnancy as a ball of fat that turns itself into a baby....I never factored in that you literally feel every movement (which makes sense seeing where your uterus has nerve endings, but bygones) so I find myself marveling anytime the kid moves in the slightest.

I'm at the point right now where things are beginning to be a little uncomfortable. Getting up in the morning can be quite the task (meaning I have to roll a few times to get into a sitting position) but it's more because of the pressure that I feel in my belly than anything. I'm not HUGE....but the tummy is definitely hard and defined now. I'm sure in the next couple of weeks, I'll be enthralled at how fast it grows. What I am surprise about, however, is that my appetite hasn't changed. I mean, I thought I'd be constantly hungry, that I'd be shoving food down my gullet like I was a starving orphan, but I really just eat breakfast, lunch and dinner with a snack and a glass of milk in between. That's probably why I'm doing just fine on the approximate weight gain. I am, however, still partial to sweets which is odd for me because before the baby I was a veggie/fruit lover and now I barely even glance at a stalk of broccoli.

As most of you know, we won't be finding out the sex of the baby. After all, I need something to look forward to in the end, and it's pretty fun to watch people duke it out over what they think I'm having. A lot of people have been asking what I'm feeling it'll be and to be honest with you, my mind changes every other day. Sometimes I'm convinced it's a girl and then other times, I find myself calling it "he". Anyway, I did take one of those tests - you know, the ones that are supposed to predict the gender based on old wives tales like what foods do you crave, how fast is the heartbeat, how are you carrying the baby, etc, etc - and mine came out almost 50/50. Perhaps it's a hermaphodite? Just sayin'.

Scott's got the honor of naming the child if it's a boy and he's currently wavering between Wolfgang and Earl. I'm pushing for Wolfgang....tell me that Wolf isn't a cool, badass nickname!!!! He just likes Earl Campbell for the whole "our boy needs to have a sports figure name" phenomenon. I think that was the name of a running back. Anyway, cross your fingers for Wolfy because God only knows what he might come up with next. I name it if it's a girl and I'm currently running a top ten list. I definitely like the strange names, because let's face it I've always been a little strange, but it's hard coming up with a good list. I do like the idea of having a name that begins with Z so I'm liking the sound of Zinnia. But hey, I could take one look at the little chick and think to myself, "She totally looks like __________" (fill in the blank with a funky name).

Now my mom will be the first one to tell you that I've always been a rebellious creature. If she told me not to touch something, I had to make it a point to touch it, regardless of the fact that I might not have actually wanted to touch it. The need to disobey has always been in me and it never really dissipated. That being said, that rebellious disobedience did not disappear in my adulthood and has only heightened with the pregnancy. I can't stand being told that I cannot do things. It annoys me. And then it makes me want to do those things they told me not to do. Not saying I've hit a crack pipe or went on a tequila bender or anything, but I've kind of taken the European approach to this whole experience. The way I figure it is that women have been giving birth for thousands of years and they didn't have all of these crazy restrictions in the past. So yes, I eat soft cheese. I go in the hot tub and I don't worry about getting hypothermia or overheating. Occasionally, I'll have a little Guinness and every night, I have a bit of wine before bed. I don't play soothing music to my belly (in fact, it's usually alternative rock that me and baby rock out to). If the baby nudges me, I nudge it back. I also won't be registering for a bunch of baby stuff that I won't ever use and I will be encouraging anyone who will be buying anything for the child to try to go minimalist. In other words, don't buy expensive clothing because the kid is only going to vomit on them, poop in them and spit up on them. Not to mention, it'll grow out of it so quick :) If it's a girl, I'll be buying her leather, getting her stick-on tattoos and piercing her nose at the age of 5. No pink please.

Damn. I went on and on and on, didn't I? Sorry about that. Blame it on Seth, he made me feel guilty. Anyway, Scott wanted to take pics of me last night but I was in my pajamas and didn't feel like posting pics with dog hair coating my sweats so hopefully, I can get him to shoot a few before I change tonight after work. I'll post a blog all about my first prenatal yoga class in a couple of days....it'll probably take that long to regain feeling in some of my limbs anyway.

To Quench the Insatiable Thirst

I took this last night to quench your insatiable thirst for belly photos. Scott will take better ones when he has time. Until then, you'll just have to enjoy this one, eh?

Halfway Point

Today marks the halfway point to this pregnancy....YAY!!!! I've been getting some not-so-subtle requests for belly photos and they're coming soon. Scott had to work last night and he'll be out tonight too so I'll have to hanker down this week to get some pics taken and downloaded.

Be patient, my little pickles, they're on the way!

Philosophical Musings

Sometimes I can't shut my mind off. This can either be good or bad, depending on your perspective, but usually when something bothers me (or alternately excites me) I can't just ignore my emotions. I have to talk about it, get it off my chest, rave about it or write about it....because my mind can't let it go.

This week, I'm very disheartened. In a world where everything is uncertain, where history was made, where some hope of progression was finally attained, I feel that a huge step back was taken in the state of California (and other states as well). I'm not sure how many of you know this, but California had a proposition up for vote that would ban gay marriage. Earlier in 2008, the CA Supreme Court had allowed for gay marriage, and opponents of this allowance effectively entered this proposition on the ballot. Well, it passed by a narrow margin. Since gay marriage had been approved, thousands of gay marriages had taken place across the state...and now these unions will also be brought into question. Will they be recognized as official unions? Or will we take another huge step back and deny basic rights to those that believed that they would finally be allowed the same equal treatment as any other couple who loves each other?

Of course, I have a more personal investment in this. However, what I can't wrap my mind around is why this proposition had advocates. Aren't we past all of the prejudices? There was once a time where African Americans were enslaved, where blacks couldn't eat in the same restaurants as whites, where blacks and whites couldn't get married....and now, in a time where we should be celebrating breaking through racial and prejudicial barriers, we take a step backward. We deny the basic right to marry to a group of people whose only apparent "sin" is that they happen to love someone of the same sex.

Really? Really. This is a sin?

In a world where heterosexual couples mistreat each other, beat one another, don't support each other, and cheat on each other.....we judge homosexual couples simply because they love each other. This is not to say that homosexual couples don't have their share of drama and hurt, but why is one group treated as if their behavioral and sexual choice is RIGHT and the other is inherently wrong? Who are we to say what is right? Who are we to place those limitations? And who are we to judge?

I heard an argument recently that defended approving the ban because "marriages have been between a man and a woman for thousands of years". I found myself scoffing at this defense of why one would approve this ban because I was trying to figure out why it makes it right because we've been doing it this way for so long...because if we went by that argument, then we'd still be enslaving human beings because of the color of their skin, we'd still be accusing and hanging women of witchcraft on the town square, still be terrified of every other religion besides Christianity...

We live in a ridiculous world and sometimes I really just want to grab people by the scruffs of their necks and try to shake some common sense into them. In a perfect world, every one of us should have equal rights....but in our world, in this ridiculous world we dictate, an entire sector of people have just been denied a basic, beautiful right.

And this makes me sad.

Circle of Life

A historical moment for all Americans! YAY!!!

It's the circle of life
And it moves us all
Through despair and hope
Through faith and love
Till we find our place
On the path unwinding
In the circle
The circle of life

(Yes, that is from the Circle of Life....the song from the Lion King movie)

Vote 2008

Don't forget to get yourselves out today and vote!

My Own Little Big Kid

The more I think about it, the more I realize that I'm probably more prepared to take on a child than I originally thought. I mean, after all, I do have my own little big kid already.

Here he is all dressed up for Halloween :) Isn't he sexy?????

Ballroom Dancer or Boxer or NFL Kicker

So Hobbit is an active little fucker. I really started to feel it jumping around in there, and not surprisingly, it is usually after I get in the car and pump up the radio. I've decided that either Hobbit is already practicing for its future career (thus the title of this entry) OR it's trying to kick its way out of the womb.

Ready for a Close Up

Hobbit's head, all up close and personal :) Momma insisted that I get this up as soon as humanly possible so here we go, kiddies.

Miss the Sis and Her Little Cindy Too!

Here's a quote from Paolini's new book Brisingr that helps bring to light how I feel now that I've had a fun, ridiculously carefree, silly, spirited but TOO SHORT week with Christy and Cindy. Over the years we've become closer and when I get the pleasure of being in her company, it reminds me that life itself is short. Those moments that we can snatch, those happy times where we are complete and beautiful and united - whether it be with someone else, ourselves, the world, nature - can seem fleeting and untouchable. It is in those moments that I find true happiness. Thank you both for coming here and stopping time.

"Ever the sun traces its path from horizon to horizon, and ever the moon follows, and ever the days roll past without care for the lives they grind away, one by one."

Enough of the seriousness....let's get to the silliness:




































Thanks, both of you, for being here and being absolutely silly and crazy with us! We love you so much and Hobbit is so lucky to have a godmother like you, Christy, and a wonderful aunt like you, Cindy. Miss you too much already.

More Mischief

OK, so over the past few nights Christy and I have decided to continue taking random items and posing with them....that being said, here are a few of our masterful pieces of mischievous art....

This is Christy's new pet, named DJ (Dustin Jizz). He had to pee so I taught him how to use the toilet.















This is DJ wanting to use the stripper pole. With Cindy's panties holding him up...















And Obama as a panty sniffer....
















And Christy and I as pantyheads....

No Republican Hobbits, Please

Hobbit is its pet name. Due on April 5th, 2009...I wonder if this entitles me to vote twice in this November's election????

Cousin It Loves the Red Sox

So last night, I decided that every night when Christy and Cindy go to sleep, I would take an object of theirs and take funny pictures with it, then post them onto the blog each morning.

Day One: Christy's Red Sox visor. Cousin It loves the Red Sox.

Drumroll please....

And the reaction when Dude returned to his Tin Cube....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cu57tcTNAaA

Click on the link to check it out!!!!

Tin Women's Vengeance

There's something to be said for vengeance, especially when born, nurtured and then carried out with infinite patience by two very sinister women.

A quick backstory: a coworker, let's call him Dude, is on vacation this week. Prior to leaving, however, Dude decided to play around with myself and another girl from work (who we'll call Badass Wench) and then, true to his cocky and swaggering demeanor, was stupid enough to copy us both on his belittling emails (which detailed his taunting, almighty belief that he is MAN and he can ROAR...in short, he goaded us). I'm sure in his mind, he wondered what her or I could possibly come up with that might disrupt his pretty organized life in any way. Did I mention that Dude might be obsessive-compulsive? Organization, perfectionism and possible obsessive-compulsive disorder are key elements here.

I suppose he never dreamed that Badass Wench and I would join forces. Probably a good thought, seeing where her and I have only really passed greetings in the halls....but his mistake was copying us both on his smug emails, thus uniting us to a greater cause. This is a delightful match made in Hell.

Let's recap and then fast forward: Dude starts small duel with girls individually. Girls retaliate on their own, launching singular and disbanded attacks on Dude. Girls realize that Dude has inexplicably copied them both on emails, outlining his omnipotent status as ultimate and unbeatable male. Girls contact each other separately and join forces, becoming a conduit for rogue sinister thoughts and actions. Girls plot vengeance. Dude leaves on week-long vacation. Girls begin to unravel their ultimate plan. Girls put the grand scheme into motion. Dude is still on vacation, happily whistling to himself around Europe without a care in the world.

Now seriously, tell me that you wouldn't want to do this in your office:
















Oh yes, we're talking pens, rulers, phone, keyboard....FILES....individual papers....even the pushpins that were holding those individual papers....chair....computer....his grandpa's photos.

Go ahead. Imagine the look on Dude's face once he realizes that he cannot do ANYTHING without having to unwrap its foil casing first.

Nymphadora

I went from this:















To this:















Meet Nymphadora, my new Beetle-Bug! I originally named her after Arwen, the hot little minxie elf in Lord of the Rings, but decided that the name didn't quite fit the car. So I've since named her after a character in Harry Potter, otherwise known as Tonks, or Nymphadora. Now that name just seems appropriate.

YAY! No more clunks, no more bumpers falling off or strange noises coming from under the hood.....Gorgeous little thing, isn't she?

Damn It, I Must Talk Politics

I am a true believer that people are going to vote for who they will vote for, that attempting to change someone's mind is usually a moot point, and that we should all have the freedom to believe in and vote for a candidate that reflects our own beliefs and morals. For that reason, I've refrained from putting anything overwhelmingly political on my blog, however, the time has now come where I can ignore it no longer. For those of you that don't know, I am an Obama supporter. This doesn't mean that I am going to engage in endless debates with everyone and anyone who happens to be a McCain advocate. I respect everyone's choices and I know that people are deciding on candidates that will enact policies that affect their own lives, values, and choices.

That being said, for me personally, the introduction of Sarah Palin as the veep nominee on the McCain ticket really insulted me. I was not a Hillary follower but if I had been, I would've really been annoyed at McCain's choice of Palin, simply because it appears that she was chosen simply because she is a woman (albeit a gun-toting, anti-choice, mooseburger-chewing huntress from Alaska)....anyway, I came across the following in an email that was sent to me by a die-hard democrat and it had me laughing so hard I almost wet myself. I thought I'd share for those of you that can appreciate it. For those of you that can't, I don't care. Just try not read any further. I'd hate to offend Palin supporters :)

Let's call this the "She Has A Vagina" Monologue:

Hi Everyone,
We're still in Denver where we've participated in one of the most thrilling experiences of our lives!! Details to follow when we see, or speak with each other!

However, I have to say that when McCain announced Sarah Palin as his running mate, as a woman, I immediately knew that I had no option but to change my party affiliation! This will be the very first time that I vote Republican, but as you know, I was a Hillary supporter and now there's a female candidate for the Vice-Presidency! I mean really; here is this pretty, evangelical woman who decided not to abort her Down syndrome son and who's been Governor for almost TWO WHOLE years in one of the least populated states in the nation...who shoots moose at 3am and who graduated with a BA in journalism and a MINOR in political science from the University of Idaho, and while it is true that she has no record of public service until she started campaigning in the late 90's, when her ESPN dreams of reporting sports on TV ended abruptly, she HAS A VAGINA!

She was Mayor of a town of 7,000 (when Barack was a state senator representing 210,000 people) so she knows how to govern, and by virtue of the fact that her state is so close to Russia, she automatically has foreign policy experience! (this was actually an argument made by one of the party hacks I heard on TV) and...most importantly...SHE HAS A VAGINA!

It is true that my new candidate, John McCain, has had many bouts with melanoma, just celebrated his 72nd birthday, and looks kind of wax-like, and his choice of a vice president had to be carefully thought out, because the vice president would one 'stage 4 melanoma' away from the presidency. I know that he has said that he would choose someone with whom he felt comfortable and had a relationship, and that he's only met Sarah Palin once, but really, she HAS A VAGINA! And after all, isn't that all we women want! Just to have a candidate who has a vagina!

Yes it is true that my old party, the Democratic party, nominated a woman in 1984, and that that woman, Geraldine Ferraro, fought hard for my candidate Hillary Clinton, this time around. And yes it's true that it only took 24 years for my new party to nominate a woman...but this woman is really quite spectacular! I mean, her favorite food is mooseburger and she can shoot a sniper rifle. What a plus when you're meeting with foreign diplomats. Oh wait, I don't think she yet knows what a foreign diplomat is, but I hear she's quick study...and SHE HAS A VAGINA.

I cannot wait for Tina Fey to play her in the movie version of what I see as a great American story. Working title: 'SHE HAS A VAGINA!'

I know there's lots of work to be done, and that right at this moment Sarah is being investigated on ethic charges stemming from her firing of a government employee who refused to fire her ex-brother in law, a cop who was engaged in a nasty divorce from Sarah's sister, but didn't Barack say that we must be our brother and sister's keeper! Sarah was simply doing that; she's a good sister!

Sarah's oldest child, a son, is being deployed to Iraq (I know that Sen. Biden's son Beau, attorney general of Delaware, is also being deployed to Iraq, as a reservist, but he simply said that he 'had other responsibilities in the fall, so he couldn't be around to help out his father' and never really used the opportunity to make his very patriotic credentials known) and unlike Senator Biden, a 36 year member of the Senate and author of the most comprehensive (1994) Domestic Violence bill ever created and passed, who talks about helping women, through this bill and his foundation for women with breast cancer, Sarah Palin has gone one step farther...and done what Senator Biden has never been able to do, and will NEVER be able to do. My new candidate, Sarah Palin, doesn't just make policy helping women throughout our country; my candidate actually HAS A VAGINA! Take that Senator Biden!

So it is for this reason that I have carefully decided that as a woman, it is my first obligation to support the Republican ticket, because Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin HAS A VAGINA! Despite the fact that Sarah Palin represents EVERYTHING I despise, and EVERYTHING that I believe is the worst in America (except the part where she was first runner-up in the Miss Alaska contest...you guys know that I love a good beauty contest), I will be voting for her in November.

In the end, my new candidate, John McCain, got it right: he knew that we women were so dumb, so vapid, so 'one issue', so unconcerned about the war, foreign policy, poverty, education (by the way, my new candidate Sarah Palin, has said, and then retracted, that creationism should be taught alongside scientific theories in schools, or minimally be an option for our children in school), AIDS, gay rights, the environment (by the way, my new candidate Sarah Palin is unconvinced that global warming exists, or that humans have any part in it, if it does exist, which she feels is yet to be proven) and the rest of the issues that matter to our children and grandchildren; that all he'd have to do to get us to see the light would be to select a running mate who HAS A VAGINA!!! Kudos to the members of my new party, the Republican party. They really do know the answer to the age old question 'what do women want?' They got it right. We just want a candidate with whom we can go to the bathroom. After all is said and done...McCain knew that when push came to shove we women would have to get behind Sarah Palin as we wait for our turn to pee! The lines are usually so long and maybe that could be one of Sarah's first initiatives! More toilets for women!

I am so proud to be an American and I have no doubt that Sarah Palin will help rebuild our beloved country. John McCain must be rewarded and supported for showing such incredible respect and regard for our country by choosing a candidate with absolutely no expertise in any area (although she seems to have the lip gloss thing down), but who has lots of estrogen, because after all, isn't that what we women all wanted; a candidate who HAS A VAGINA!

I am truly nauseated and sickened, but I feel a little better now that I've gotten this off my chest!
See you when we get home.
Love,
X

Something to Look Forward To

I love it when there's something to look forward to! No, I'm not necessarily excited about my 33rd birthday (hissssss, I'm still 28, you know). So what is it, you ask yourselves? What could possibly have me so excited that my enthusiastic anticipation has reached a dizzying crescendo?

This:





In exactly 37 days, my beautiful little sister and her wonderful woman will be storming into San Diego .... this poor city has no idea what it's in for!!!! Anyway, it is definitely something to look forward to and I can't wait to see them!!!!! YAY! Whoooooppppppeeeeeeeee!!!! Can we fast-forward time?

Odds and Ends

Life is really freaking strange sometimes. I had an interesting week and seeing where for the past month nothing extremely interesting has happened, I figured I'd write about it.

My last post was about friends resurfacing from the past. It's such a wonderful thing to be found after a certain amount of years, and it's amazing to gossip, catch up, giggle, and to fall back into place as if there were a little wrinkle in time...as if you jumped from ten years ago to the present in a matter of a few minutes. As wonderful as it was to be refounding a friendship that seemed lost, someone else found me recently that gave me cause to wonder: What about those previous friends that you might not want to be in contact with again? What if there were things that happened that needed to be mended and what if the rift was too great to bridge?

Of course, someone from my past, someone that I was once good friends with, found me and made contact. I will not name this person because her identity is not important to the story but when I received a message from her, my first thought was "I don't think I want to answer." I did give myself a few hours and I thought about it....and I decided to respond but I didn't do so with blinders on. I fully understood that in order for us to be friends again, there needed to be some reconciliation for unpleasant occurrences. I also figured that my memories might be entirely different from hers. I am no longer a person to ignore things, I am no longer someone that can pretend that things in life didn't happen or that they don't need to be addressed. Life is too short to embroil oneself in strife. Needless to say, I said my piece and it seems as if we weren't meant to be friends after all.

On to more interesting, and disheartening, things that happened this week. This morning, my good friend was let go, along with a few handfuls of others, and I'll be honest....it pissed me off. Yeah, yeah, I know it's the way of the world and I know that we're all under a corporate thumb, yadda, yadda, yadda...but I don't have to like it and I won't pretend that I do. For someone like Jen, who works hard, has an incomparable work ethic, who questions everything, who is literally that "irreplaceable" employee in a world where everyone can be replaced, to lose her job just sickens me. She took it well...a consummate professional.....but the office will be a quieter, bleak little shadow of a place without her dynamic presence there.

Who the hell is going to make fun of Olympic diving with me now????

On a GOOD note...every day that passes brings my Critty and Cindy closer to their trip to San Diego and I can't freaking WAIT!!!!!!! Get out here already! I hope everyone is doing well and I'll chat with you all soon!

M&M

When I was younger, I was one of those people that wouldn't let someone too close because I was afraid that they would recognize some inner weakness and use my vulnerabilty against me. I never allowed myself to become too close to people and to be honest with you, until I met Livia, and then later Scott, I continued to put up my personal walls without fail and without a second thought. I knew that some saw through me but I didn't care. I had to protect myself at all costs.

When I was younger, my little sister and I had a conversation that I will never forget and it was probably one of the first in which I was truly honest and open; and it was the same for her. Since that day, we have never turned back. We've become sisters in the true sense, and we've protected each other and loved each other unconditionally.

After having that conversation with Christy, after meeting Livia who is someone that demands truth from me at all times no matter what it costs, I've turned into a different person from the one I was in my youth.

That being said....over the past few days I've had an amazing treat, one that no one could hope for and receive. I've lost contact with some wonderful friends in the past and I've suddenly gotten back into touch with them....they sought me out because hell, we all know that I suck at technology and I am grateful that they're better at it than I am.

First Melanie and then Marlayne. Thus the title M&M. I actually think they'd really hit it off together. Massachusetts meets Kentucky. Oh, I've got to get a front row seat to that show.

Mel...my friend from the Midwest that has got to be one of the bubbliest people I know. Hey, is bubbliest even a word?

Marlayne....my blonde, even-keeled twin who enjoyed torturing cheerleaders as much as I did....

Life is unpredictable. I'd like to say that I am the same. Sometimes, however, predictability isn't black and white; I'll be honest, I'm happy for it. The people in your life, the ones that you get and love and understand and adore...well, sometimes they go away and sometimes you wish you had them back in your life again. I've gotten that chance again.

Anyway, I wanted to say that sometimes life takes you in a different direction. Sometimes, you question things, you wonder about people, you wish you could time travel.....I'm pleased that those people that I wondered about, those people that meant something to me even if I couldn't fully show it to them were the ones that are now coming back into my life.

From karaoke to yellow tomatoes......I'm grateful. Life is really good right now.

Strength of Life

I know it's been a while since I've written but to be honest, there wasn't much to write about until now. Suddenly, life is filled with turmoil. Not for myself and Scott but again, there is a weird sequence of events that forces me to think about more serious things. First and foremost, my boss, Helen, who is recovering from breast cancer (with a good prognosis) has lost her husband. I know that some time ago, I mentioned that he was terminal.

This past Friday, her husband was transferred to a rehabilitation center after he started sinking into severe confusion. The doctor in his hospital was horrible to Helen, not explaining to her that these were his last days. The new doctor at the rehab house sat her down and informed her of exactly what was going on, preparing her for the end. The very next day he was gone.

For the past year, most of my professional life has been embroiled in the journey that this woman and her husband have embarked upon and when I say she is one of the strongest women that I know, I do not jest. She has suffered alongside her husband, supported him, undergone her own sickness and recovery....and now that she is finally on the wellness road, he passes away from her. I know that in some way, it is a relief that he went quickly, but it saddens me that in the very end, she wasn't told what she was looking at....no one had enough grace and bedside manner to simply tell her that he was looking at his last days.

Of course, this made me wonder about human nature. It made me think about my own mortality, the machinations of the world, the very cruelty of fate. I realize now that some things that I've cared about don't deserve it....and some things that I've dismissed deserve my care. I can be that little silly girl, the one with Peter Pan Syndrome, the one that doesn't ever want to take life seriously....and I wonder when life gets serious....could I give it that attention it needs? Over the past five months, while I listened for news on Helen's recovery, when I saw her come into the office in the cute little pink ballcap that covered her bald head, I wondered how I would react if a similar situation became us. I wondered if I could be as strong.

I'm not a particularly religious person. I believe that happiness is in the responsibility of oneself....I believe that you and only you have the key to the outcome of your own future. But then I look at Helen and I realize that sometimes fate throws you a curveball and you can swing and miss. I just don't want to strike out.

Life is short. What a cliche. But strength is everlasting. Helen, I know you will probably never read this but if you do, know that you have been an inspiration to many and that despite your suffering and despite this awful year, you have a gigantic circle of people (some that you know, some that you don't) that are grieving with you at this moment.

I've Been Lei'ed

More to come!

Aloha!

We're heading off to Hawaii in the morning and I couldn't be more thankful for a vacation! It's been a rough couple of months and to be honest, laying on a beach somewhere and pretending that I live a fictional life is not a horrible thing. I love travel anyway, but I usually choose a location that is going to challenge me, inspire me, incite me....

For once, I just want to be lazy. If I'm inspired...if I'm challenged....if I'm incited....all the better. However, I have no immediate plans to do anything but snorkel, helicopter, hike, eat, drink, sleep, laze around, swim, attempt to surf....

We come back early morning on the 20th. I will send pics...Scott got a new camera which means that he will be taking photographic shots of EVERYTHING.

I leave you with some words that inspired me in the sense that life is continuous, unbreaking, redundant and in need of a jolt sometimes:

"So sure are you of the endless drumming rhythm of your isolation that you are painfully slow to adjust
if only because
yours is not that genre of story
still and again, life cannot muster the stuff of movies..."
~Ani DiFranco

500

Fitting, isn't it? Fitting that Manny should hit his 500th homerun at Camden Yards versus Seth's Orioles. Too bad he didn't run around high-fiving fans. Now that would've been priceless.

Oh You Need To Involve the Pups...Do You?

So Critty used the freaking dogs. She had to use the freaking dogs, didn't she? She won't wager, because she's too scared, but she had to go to the cuteness of the puppy-love. Fine. I'm going there too.

Take this, Auntie Critty and Cousin Jolie. Hey, Cousin Jacoby, you tell them that you want to shred the shirt because you're a secret Pistons fan....so take this! I can play the puppy game too! And Scott says...well....I'm sure you can guess from his body language.

Puzzle Pieces

No explanation. Just read and let me know how you feel.

I walked out unsteadily into the salty night and leaned my face toward the breeze. Tonight, I would become independent. Tonight, I would take my first kill without the help of my father. Tonight, I would make myself worthy. I would be the kind of monster that I could accept, the one that chose her path, the one that decided it would be better to not take human life. The one that turned her back on her nature and opted for an alternative lifestyle.

I raced through the trees, feeling breathless but exhilarated. I stalked through the thick wood animalistically, sniffing, searching. Shortly after, I found the perfect prey. A big bear with her cubs.

She reared violently and stood for a protective attack but I didn’t want her, I wanted her children; I wanted their innocence and wonder. I wanted what my new life now denied me. I wanted their blood to warm my veins and my vacant heart.

I made quick work of the mother, draining her completely, and turned toward her nest, searching for the one that had fascinated me, the innocent one that I in turn wanted to capture. There was one cub that caught my attention, one that I wanted to take in hopes that I could somehow seize some of him and infuse it into me.

He caught my eye because he was bathing his siblings with his tongue, far more protective of them, far more aware of them, than should be expected. None of them realized that their mother would not return for them. He was a sweet cub, attentive, the big brother of the group, and for the simple fact that I wanted him, wanted to take him from their lives, I didn’t think I deserved to exist. I was still monstrous, but it was a level of monstrosity that I could sadly accept.

When he was nearly asleep, I cradled him and hugged him to me. His face, all eyes with a bit of nose and snout, was peaceful as if he knew what I was going to do to him, but was kind enough to allow it. I’d chosen him because I honestly wanted his sweet innocence to be transferred back to me, wanted to recapture my own childhood virtue.

I wanted that sweetness of innocence again, the vulnerability that comes with being too young to understand life.

I dipped my head toward the young cub’s neck and fed on him messily, internally thankful that he didn’t notice. I could feel his blood streaming down my throat, but I’d been so chaotic with this hunt that some of it had splashed across my face. I mentally noted that I would need to be more careful, more aware of a clean kill.

The blood again was warm, so musical, as it flowed through my body. I almost felt complete.

A twig snapped, jerking my attention from my feeding. My head shot upward and my preternatural eyes scanned the horizon, finding nothing at first, but then I looked to the left, into the darkness of the trees and saw a silhouette standing there, watching me. The bear cub was dead, still cradled in my arms, as I sat cross-legged on the chilly ground. The chill didn’t affect me as much; although I didn’t like the cold, it was a constant, dull reminder of my new arctic nature. I could feel a rivulet of blood dripping slowly from the corner of my right lip to my chin. My long hair clung to one of my cheeks, glued there by the bear’s blood. I must’ve looked fiendish to the human eye.

Friendly Wager?

When Scott and I first got together, we, like normal couples, discussed our love for our sports teams. He was a diehard Raider fan, of course, as well as a Pistons fan. He didn't really have a preference of baseball teams, but seeing where he was from Michigan, he usually just rooted for the Detroit Tigers.

I put an end to that quickly by insisting that he convert to a Red Sox fan. This conversion came at a price, however. He would become part of the vast Red Sox nation (actually I believe the year he became a fan is the year that they broke away from the curse and won the World Series), but I had to become a fan of one of his teams. There was no way in hell that I was going to be part of Raider Nation (that only happens once a year when the Raiders play the Chargers) and seeing where I hadn't followed the Celtics since the 80's during the Laker wars, I adopted the Pistons as my team.

I can hear Christy hissing through her teeth. Seeing where the Pistons have dropped Game 1, a wager is of course in her best interest. So what'll it be Christy? If the Celtics take the series, what do you want? And when the Pistons advance, what do we want? Shall we place a friendly wager?

Manny Being Manny

Last night, we hosted a few friends (one of them being a diehard Orioles fan and self-proclaimed Yankee hater) and the topic of Manny Ramirez came up. Seeing where it was a game against the Orioles that Manny caught a ball in left, high-fived a fan and chucked the ball into Cora, who had the heads-up throw to first to get the double play, Seth was a little miffed. He doesn't really respect the whole "Manny Being Manny" mentality, doesn't really understand the goofiness of the dude, or the drive, or the determination. We wasted an hour or so discussing it with no one really giving up their stance. One of the things we talked about was Cal Ripken and how he embodies old school baseball.

Before I continue, for all of Red Sox Nation, sign onto http://www.sethmarko.blogspot.com/ and give him shit about his post. Please, leave him as many nasty comments as you wish. The more, the better.

Moving forward, I came across an article where Manny's teammates were talking about what kind of player he is. I'd like to quote Curt Schilling (for the full article, go to: http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/story/8142840?MSNHPHMA).



Everyone always think the most talented players — the Cal Ripkens of the world — are just gifted. It's the exact opposite. They are gifted. But they work harder — in a lot of cases, twice as hard — as everybody else. That was the personality who came to mind for me with Manny — Cal. Cal took a hundred groundballs every day — every day. Manny hits and he's in the video room as much as I am, watching video.



There you go, Seth. In your face.

Hawaii Here We Come!

YAAAAAAY!!!!!!! We finally booked our tix (again) today and I cannot tell you how excited I am! A little less than a month and we'll be lounging on the beautiful beaches of Kauai, hiking volcanoes, snorkelling, tanning, wandering through jungles....I cannot wait! Sometimes you need an escape from life and I'm very happy that ours is hanging on the horizon.

Summer's Knockin'

Summer brings so much happiness and excitement, so much activity....so much promise. I miss our time on the open water with the sun beating down on us, the ridiculousness of Ed skimming over the wake at breakneck speed, our picnics, or just lulling around in the bay and swimming in the warm surf.

So summer's knockin' and I'm ready to answer.

I Am Sad

Just recently, we received news that some very great friends of ours - people that we have respected and emulated - are separating. We're taking the split road in the sense that we cannot judge and we cannot take sides. Thankfully, for me, I became friends with them both at the same time so my loyalty is where it should be: in limbo. I can see both sides of the tale and I advise where I'm allowed, and yes, I can really see both sides of their coin.

This upsets me for many reasons. The first is that this was one of those couples that I hoped Scott and I would be like....I'd met them when they were just as in love as I was (despite me not wanting to admit it). They were so loving, sweet, happy and exuberant. I remember thinking, upon first judgment, that I wanted to have what they had.

Coming from a family where my parents have a strong loving marriage, coming from a background where values were revered, I felt that for the first time in years I'd seen a marriage that might come close to that. So I am sad, mainly because they represented that for me. I suppose I felt all warm and fuzzy inside whenever we were around them.

They made me feel like a part of their family, they made me realize how important that love and respect on a familial level is.

Soooooo...

Scott: I don't say I love you enough but I love you more than I could ever put into words, and I'm a word whore which means I'm speechless.

Christy and Livia: I miss you so much and sometimes I really feel that I've left a part of me behind when I think of you both. I'd LOVE to drag you to a crazy deserted island somewhere! Not in a dirty way...

Mom and Dad: You've both given me an amazing base for my life and I could not ever really thank you for the lessons that you've taught, the strength that you've instilled and the honesty that you always give.

Jen: You rock. Plain and simple. You inspire me.

Di: I get it. I really get it. Your courage is incomparable.

Sara and TJ: No words except "I'm proud".

I love all of you, my friends and family. You know who you are. Sometimes I don't say it enough...sometimes I don't show it enough....and I suppose that is my lesson for this week.

For Nana

I recognize that sometimes I can't be there to lend a shoulder, an ear, or just a presence when things are not so fun. I've been thinking over the last couple of days, as Nana is in rehab (makes her sound like a loony drug-addicted celebrity, doesn't it?) that the only thing I can really contribute to her right now, besides phone calls and cards, are words.

I came across a quote that touched me and made me think of her and I hope that it is fitting to not only her inner-beauty but also the way that she's affected other people. I suppose this ties in to my previous blog where I discussed how ineffective some can be....but that's not the case with Mrs. Yolanda Ellis.

To be resolute in the Way means
From the beginning never to lose sight of it,
Whether in a place of calm or in a place of strife;
To not cling to quiet places nor
Shun places where there is disturbance.
~Daikaku

In Memoriam

2008 continues to prove unlucky for the Campbells. Last night, Buster started having breathing issues that progressively got worse into the late night and then early morning. At about 3 am, we rushed him to the emergency vet hospital because this horrible sound was coming from him and he started vomiting. His larynx was collapsing, and they were fairly certain that he would need a permanent trache. After much difficult consideration, Scott decided that Buster shouldn't suffer any more and opted to put him to sleep. He would've been 15 next month.

For an older dog, Buster showed an aptitude for tenacity that I'm sure will go unmatched. He has fought through many illnesses and surgeries but always pulled through, always came out of it with his spunk and determination blazing. Even as we said our good-byes at 3:30 this morning, he was still trying to jump off the vet table (he never did like them), despite struggling for his breath.

He had a penchant for stuffed animals (see the stolen monkey in the above picture), for staring blankly at walls for hours, for snoring insufferably loud while still awake, for pushing his dinner bowl around the kitchen noisily in search of any stray pellets that may have escaped his notice, and for sunbathing.

We will miss you, Buster Boy. The house is already far too quiet without you.

Simple Conversation

The one thing amongst many that I love about my friends is that they force me to really look at myself, whether I want to or not. I truly believe that most of the time, they don't realize how much their words affect me. Again, back on words and my love for them, but it's true. When someone regurgitates a story to me that has absolutely nothing to do with me...but still incites emotion from me....it is intensive but sometimes harsh.

Here's where a simple conversation can make one question themselves, make them wonder about how effective they are as a person, or maybe more importantly how compassionate and relatable they are. I've never felt that I've been an overly sympathetic person, nor necessary a humble person. I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I'm inherently selfish, one of my characteristics that I've come to accept, and sometimes curb, about myself.

One of my friends has been telling me an amazingly crazed story about an ex-friend who tends to be selfish and dramatic and cold.....three traits that I sometimes award to myself. When I hear these tales I wonder if I'm that horrible, if I'm that selfish and if I'm that nasty. I wonder if I've done something that I'm unaware of, if I've treated someone with such disrespect (and not delivered a much-needed apology)....for the first time in my 32 years, I actually thought about what others think. Not about me, per se, but about something unfair and insensitive that I'd done.

I know that I feel that way about some people. I know that I feel that they've done something to me and I wish they would open up the communication lines with me so that we could put it behind us. I know that I wish I could be a more humble person, but that humility does not come naturally. I know my own flaws.

So to those of you that know me (or think you do), either post a flaw of mine (along with one of yours, my little kittens) OR post a quality you wish you had. I'll start!

I wish I was more attentive to other people. Sometimes I am too focused on my own bullshit to really, really listen to someone.

You're up!

Words

Almost every day, I hear something or read something that enlightens me, affects me, saddens me...invokes some sort of emotion from me. I love words. I love them. When I watch movies, I tend to want to put on the subtitles so I can read the script (so as to not miss a very important line or word) and match the acting to the emotion. So every now and then I like to share words that inspire me.

That being said, I know that I'm not in the Boston area and sometimes things happen where I wish I was with my family and friends. As most everyone who is reading this blog is of some familial connection, you know that Nana was sent to the hospital today and when I spoke with her, she sounded positively exhausted and sad.

Sometimes not being home, not being able to be with family when they need you, is like not being with a child when they speak their first words or take their first steps. You feel like you should be there, and you feel horrible that you're not. I think sometimes when you realize that a loved one has suffered a health crisis, just like Stacey in March and now Nana in April, it puts life into perspective. It makes me think about when I was young, silly and invincible....when I used to think that life would always be sunshine and roses.

So here is a passage from a book called "Looking for Alaska" by John Green. The reference to last words is from the narrator who has a talent for knowing the final utterances of famous and obscure persons alike:

She reached into her overstuffed backpack and pulled out a book. "Gabriel Garcia Marquez. The General in His Labyrinth. Absolutely one of my favorites. It's about Simon Bolivar."
I didn't know who Simon Bolivar was, but she didn't give me time to ask. "It's a historical novel, so I don't know if this is true, but in the book, do you know what his last words are? No, you don't. But I am about to tell you, Senor Parting Remarks."

And then she lit a cigarette and sucked on it so hard for so long that I thought the entire thing might burn off in one drag. She exhaled and read to me:

"He - that's Simon Bolivar - was shaken by the overwhelming revelation that the headlong race between his misfortunes and his dreams was at that moment reaching the finish line. The rest was darkness. "Damn it," he sighed. "How will I ever get out of this labyrinth!"

I knew great last words when I heard them, and I made a mental note to get ahold of the biography of this Simon Bolivar fellow. Beautiful last words, but I didn't quite understand. "So what's the labyrinth?" I asked her.

(skipping a few paragraphs)

Her mouth was close enough to me that I could feel her breath warmer than the air, she said, "That's the mystery, isn't it? Is the labyrinth living or dying? Which is he trying to escape - the world or the end of it?" I waited for her to keep talking, but after a while it became obvious she wanted an answer.

"Uh, I don't know," I said finally. "Have your really read all those books in your room?"

The one thing that I loved about this book was that it was so raw and honest and forceful. Sometimes a simple book technically about teenage angst and intense emotion can strike an argument within yourself....and this did that. Tonight, after talking to Nana, and after thinking about my life and everyone within it, I wonder how many times I can circle a labyrinth before I start to feel like a dizzy little hamster....I wonder when I'll stop and just lie flat, look up at the sky and think that life's too short to run through a maze aimlessly. Think of it like being trapped in a room for life and you can do nothing but stare at gray walls all day. I would guess that a labyrinth would be something like that except more frenzied.

The whole point of the book is, of course, contingent on the meaning of the labyrinth that Alaska quotes from Bolivar. Is it living versus dying or is it simply a metaphor for suffering? The beautiful thing is that you can translate it however you'd like. I choose neither of those answers. The labyrinth is a journey, sometimes good, sometimes not...it either represents a frantic search, a harrowing journey or a horrifying trap of your worst nightmares. The frantic part is the need to escape. But what lies outside the walls?

Does life need to be a labyrinth? And if so, does the poor little mouse ever escape? Is escape better than the confined, familiar walls?

Oh, Lord, I've gone on too long for this. I'm sure I might expect a myspace from Mute Dave.

Spin the Black Circle

I wanted to post some fun pics of the girls on the stripper pole (which by the way has a spinning outer layer that I've dubbed the Black Circle)......fun, fun times!!!!! If you want a good background soundtrack to this, download a little Pearl Jam's "Spin the Black Circle". The women in the photos are me (duh!), Kymberli and then Jen in the background keeping Buster under wraps! We have a few photos of Jen doing a WHEEEEEEEE on the pole but I'm not sure if she actually wanted them online so ..... enjoy!

Fascinating Morning

So this morning, as I was walking past my car with cute adorable fuzzy JD, I happened to notice that someone was in my car. Yes, you read that correctly. He was all curled up on my front seat (seat back was down) and out cold. I was incredulous! My first instinct is, of course, the stupid one....to wake the idiot up and have him be on his way....but being a girl, I thought it wise that I enlist some help.

There were two gardeners that were mowing our front lawn so I politely asked them if they would help me remove the derelict from the vehicle. They were having none of it, saying that we weren't sure if he was armed, or if he was a violent person, etc and that I should call the police.

Before I continue the story, I have to insert here another stupid habit of mine is that I don't usually lock my car doors. It's a piece of dung car and I don't keep valuables in it, so I was always of the notion that if someone really wanted to steal my $2 sunglasses, I wasn't going to cry about it. Clearly, I wasn't thinking of people actually falling asleep in that piece of dung car.

So I go back inside the house and I call Scott to which I say, "Now I realize why I should lock my car doors at night" to which he replies, "Your car was broken into as well? I was just going through my truck to record what was stolen" to which I reply, "Ummm, he's still in my car, honey" to which he replies, "Call the police, I'm on my way home."

The cops are called and like a live-action episode of Cops, they staunchly creep up the driveway, guns drawn, proceed to yank open the car doors and declare, "San Diego police, let me see your hands!" The guy gets out and is cuffed.....they take all of his crap out of his pants (including a crack pipe and two items that he stole from Scott's truck) and then ask him why he was asleep in the vehicle. He then proceeds to tell them that he doesn't own the car but his friend does and his friend lets him pass out in there every now and then. Of course, the cops tell him that they know he's lying. At this point, Scott shows up, pissed and ready to go apeshit, but the cop meets him at the front of the lawn and tells him that he'd appreciate it if Scott would stay calm and not rip the suspect's head off. So instead, Scott just stood by me and glowered at the guy.

Today's lesson, kiddies: always lock your car doors and always check the car before you get in for random drug addicts that are wandering your neighborhood while you're asleep and decide that they'll catch some winks in your vehicle.

The Cold

So many people, including my lovely and mouthy best friend, have accused me of forgetting what it was like to live in a cold region. I agree to an extent. Living in SoCal definitely has its benefits but if you don't live here, you don't realize the downside to our "winter"....most homes here don't have veritable heat. Overnight, the temps hit a low of 20-40 ... and coupled with a poor heating system, this can be quite frigid.

This past weekend, we had a "storm". I put it in quotes because I'm envisioning so many of my friends and family that are laughing at me for even thinking that San Diego would be subject to any storm patterns...

I took some pics of the "storm" in hopes to show you all that sometimes San Diego is not all sunshine and surfboards. Hail, motherfuckers, hail. Literally.

A Little Bit of Hollywood

For my Mom.....who I was thinking of when we were walking the Hollywood Walk of Fame. A little piece of the past for my Momma :)

Thank You To Stacey and Family

A nice photo of what arrived for me the day after the surgery....thank you to Stacey, Brian, Brendan, Sam, Delaney and Natalie!